Aug 13, 2020
Some days, before I open my eyes to ready for rising, I seal them shut, seething with overwhelm and resistance to begin the day. The tasks are too many. The self-care daunting. I've dived back into the self-development pursuit wholeheartedly, and with that seeking-betterment-obsessed-with-growth focus, I can bog myself down with personal improvement todo's. I put in 4 hours of work before I even sit down to work.
Movement. Meditation. Breathwork. Forgiveness.
Celery Juicing. Energy Cleansing. Intention Setting. Gardening.
If a morning passes and I skip my celery juice . . . forgeddaboutit! It's like I've failed when I leave something out.
At this point, self-development becomes self-imprisonment and it's the opposite of helpful.
It must be fun. It must be fluid. Imperfection is the only way to execute.
Otherwise, there'll be more and more mornings where I don't wanna wake up. Everything will become hard and obligatory. And I'll burn the F, OUT.
When I dive too deep, push too hard and allow myself no breaks for whatever brings me Joy—an inevitable crash-and-burn awaits.
It's so much more tiring to come back from hitting the wall than - when the grind gets too great - stepping back, breathing deep, doing something fun and letting go for even just a little bit . . . a few hours . . . an afternoon . . . a whole day. Whewww! What a difference only a day makes.
I don't have to go on vacation to give myself a vacation. With a little every-day vacay, I can come back refreshed, looking forward, a little more excited and ready for some good.