I used to force my evolution by quitting jobs. Then I got really good at restricting my diet to create a change I could see - regardless of how starving it felt. When I became an entrepreneur, I used workaholism to justify my existence and rush through life with ironclad willpower. As long as I was producing, I was good. I was hustling. I was putting in the work. Until the crash-and-burn. When the tornado of desperate changes I'd made in every area of life shattered with the realization that none of it was working.
I've stumbled at every step, finally deciding to rename the falls: "practice." Life is too vast to ever find a right way. Growth is inevitable so why strive for it? I could just melt into myself and trust the world better. Knowing little. Feeling much. Creating miracles.