I often feel splayed out by the perpetual balancing act of creating art and sharing it. In the weeks leading up to now, I've been wading in the thick of the process. A book cover was designed for the very first micro blog collection (and a super cute t-shirt to go with!). I launched a new avenue to cuddle a community around my writings, while supporting ongoing self-publishing projects. I actually enjoyed the holidays free of extraneous stressing!
BUT, my writing dwindled in a lull. When I sat down to jot anything beyond a journal entry, I couldn't push through the creative blankness that filled my brain. My micro blogs pinched from a flow to a drip. Progress on my book took a heavy pause.
I often feel overwhelmed by the mechanical todo's of striding my mission forward. Movement itself seems microscopic.
To clear my distraction and de-stress:
I turn off my phone for long periods of time.
Make a daily list of "Do First's."
Journal about my life purpose first thing in the morning.
Reduce social media time (a relentless effort because scrolling has become fiercely habitual).
Pet my cat many times throughout the day.
Meditate in a patch of sunlight (which often leads to me passing out and taking a 4-hour nap).
Often, I feel like I'm totally failing. Not working hard enough. Sustaining focus long enough. Feeling positive enough.
I don't know if living a creative dream has anything to do with balance or doing a certain mix of things "right." The only terms I can come to peace with are nurturing myself in every stage and continuing to create. When life is both rainbow-kittens-inspired and batshit-scattermonkey-frustrating.
The last time I felt utterly stopped by self-doubt, my PIC (partner in crime) said, "Keep letting the talent speak for itself."
Maybe that's all there is to it.